Submitted by friend of the beatdown, LicoriceWhip:

I was recently in a situation whereupon I was walking down a hall at work and a group of, well, "mobile spectators" we'll call them, occupied the entire width of the hallway and were moving at their own sub-optimal velocity. I approached them at my optimal velocity, yet had to brake for this crowd. They acknowledged me behind them, yet they refused to give way, even after knowing I was there and was seeking passage--a most civil expectation on my part. These people deserve a self-actualizing roundhouse boot to the mutton chops.