Monday, June 26, 2006

Courtesy of Safrianna, a Golden Arches trip from hell:

I wanted to grab a burger before heading to work, and Checkers, my
first choice, was not a viable option. So I settled for the local
McDonald's, which was under renovations. I pull up to the drive
through speaker, and order a Big Mac with cheese. After I repeated it
for the lady on the other end of the giant kazoo, I drove around to
the first of two windows. She opened the window, then promptly turned
around to continuing chatting to someone else in the restaurant, while
I tried three times to get her attention. Finally, after her
conversation was finished, she turned around to me. I asked how much
she wanted, and paid her. She gave me my change, and then closed the
window. Seeing as she didn't mention the second drive through window,
and there was construction right beside the second window, I continued
to sit outside the first window, waiting for the Big Mac that was
rumored to be on its way. Finally, the woman comes back and says in
her most acidic voice, "Next window, -ma'am-." While I silently
contemplate telling her to eat a penis, I drive to the next window,
having decided that she wasn't worth it. So I sit at the second
window, waiting. A second lady, this one nicer but possibly less
intelligent, comes to the window, and asks if I ordered something. At
this point, consider my patience gone. I said yes, that I ordered a
Big Mac, hoping that my impatient tone would get across to her. She
nodded, and closed the window. About a minute later, she comes back.
"Did you pay for it?" No, I heard it was freebie day at Mickey D's. I
tell her I paid...and finally, at long last and quite some time after
I should have, I received my Big Mac. The ass at the first window
needs to be abandoned on an ice drift with a polar bear, waiting for a
rescue boat that's never going to come. The little lost girl at the
second window deserves only a quick, nonlethal beatdown for being