Saturday, July 16, 2005

We've all had lunch with someone who is the subject of today's beatdown. You know where you're at a restaurant with someone who is the last to order, after of course telling the waitstaff person "just a few more minutes" three times. Then, when it finally gets to their turn, they sit there with the "ummm, oh, what do I want-what do I want-what do I want," leaving everyone at the table rolling their eyes and considering if a good thump on the head might jumpstart the frozen organ that lies beneath the scalp. Then, when they finally say "oh, I'll have the buritto," they of course choose the one item on the menu that has more options than the menu itself. Chicken? Beef? Vegetable? Pork? Then this person spends a bunch of time considering this as if it's the purchase of his first home, his new car, or possibly the invasion of another country. Please, you downtempo dawdling putz, make a decision! It's only lunch and you deserve a beatdown.